Baby Steps

7 Weeks ago, I fell to pieces.  My therapist and my psychiatrist wanted me to do a Partial Hospitalization Program.  I resisted with all my might.  Eventually they told me either I did the Program or they were going to Section 12 me (force me in-patient).  I agreed to do the Program.

I wasn't sure how on earth I was going to commit to getting up every morning and stying in groups for apporoximately 5 hours every day.  I have agoraphobia and sometimes the idea of leaving the apartment is just terrifying.  But I did it.  And over the last 3 weeks, I've had structure and socialization.

Today I graduated from the Program.  Now I am trying to get into a Day Program in Downtown Lowell.  I think this Program lasts 4-6 weeks.  I want to keep the structure and socialization going.  Then I want to start volunteering somewhere.  Maybe just a few hours at first, but slowly building up to a few hours a day several times a week.

It seemed impossible to commit to one day.  Now I'm thinking about giving my life some meaning again.  But I don't want to get too far ahead of myself.  Take it one day at a time.  Baby Steps.

"I have survived 100% of my worst days"

I learned a lot in the program, but I'm not going to write about it because of the Anonymity and confidentiality of the Program.